Friends abroad

I want to take this post to discuss the friends that I have made since being in Singapore. Lately, I have been hanging out a lot with a group of about 15 exchange students. Some are from Sweden, France, Canada, Germany, and the US. I do have Chinese and Singaporean friends as well!

It is true that I am on my own a lot. Most of the time I am either in the library or my room, or doing something on my own. Being independent is great, but sometimes hanging out with others is important. It might be that I am introverted, or it might be that NUS feeds into this type of system. Most students here do not hangout with people, they are either studying on their own, working on a project, and in transition to somewhere else.

I find it really hard to get to know Singaporeans. I feel like on the surface the are really nice, but after the introduction bit, they dont really care to get to know you further. Now, this is a generalization. Maybe its just me? Yet, I have sat and talked to them and they tell me they hate this same paradigm.

It could change, but I think it may just be that Singaporeans live at home. They have to travel to and from home. They feel that what matters is the grade, not learning. I mean you do learn when you study, but here its more important to get a good mark, than make what you are learning applicable to life.

It shoulds a lot to what I was like in High School. My favorite teachers would be the ones that said, "listen, if you arent learning, regardless of the grade, than you will never grow, never be able to understand the world around you." I think that what study abroad is about. We are here to experience, just as much to read and study.

I thought before I came here that experience meant I had to travel, that i had to go to the different parts of the island and walk around, observe. Instead, experience just means getting to know people. Talking about things that they have done, and doing things together.

My friends from all over the world live this type of mindset. I have learned so much from them. One thing I have overcome is being so frugal I dont share. For example, when I was in Vietnam, I didnt want to spend any money so I woul get the cheapest thing, and that no offer it to anyone, even though they would offer me a taste of theirs. Also, splitting bills is the thing I HATE most about living, and studying abroad. Its so difficult. Being as inflexible as I am makes it hard, because i just want to get my exact change. usually someone ends up paying more.

But now that side of me has changed. Im not as frugal and unwilling to share. Im working on it but I have so far to go. Im not going to say that my selfishness is an American characteristic, because many of my American friends here are so willing to buy things or pay for others expenses. What I will say, is that it takes some growing up to be that way. I am the youngest person in my circle. Most everyone is 23 or older. They have lived all over the world and most speak three languages. they have lived and experienced so much more than I have. Im not envious, because I too will be someone like that at some point in my life. But they no that money comes and goes, it isnt what should drive you to do something or not do something.

Maybe Im too idealistic here, but its ok. I need to be.

Below are pictures of me with friends. This post was for me, so that I can remember. Hopefully, those that read this, think. Thats all I want it to do. Just make people think about those that are around them.